Defining the Great Line.

Hello everyone,
I got back from camp recently where I became closer to God. I have been struggling with being suicidal. I have tried to kill myself 6 times in the past three years of my life. I also have trouble trusting people. I don't let myself get attached to people either. I found God and He has taken the weight of suicide off my shoulders. But to be extremely honest it keeps coming back. Suicide is an on going battle that I myself am struggling with. The thoughts that pass through my mind have been there since I was in the 6th grade. The feeling that I was unloved and unwanted. It was like I could scream in the middle of the hall way in school and no one would care, almost like I was not there at all. I constantly cut and harmed myself. Not a single person at my school knew what I had gotten myself into. Not even my parents knew what I was doing. I wanted to forget the pain that I had concealed deep with in myself so I figured I would try that. It became an addiction, like a drug. I kept going at it. I covered it up and put up a fake smile that no one could see through. But God could. He was the only one that knew what was going on. He came after me and I continued to run. I finally said to Him "God, I can't do this anymore!" It had gotten so bad that I figured the only escape would be to take my life.

But God had a different plan. He kept whispering in my ear "Kirstie, I love you. Don't give up." The knife i had been holding for hours had been thrown from my hand and I wasn't even the one to drop it. Just when I was at my lowest about to give up on the world I found a glimmer of hope that would carry me through. Every time I get the thought of suicide I run to God and I cry out to him. I love him with ALL my heart. I have been called to be a leader. God is amazing and he has shown himself to me countless times. He meets the needs of my family every day. He has blessed me increasingly. I have learned that he has a plan for everyone, including me. I hope that my story has influenced people to give there lives to God. I have shared it quite a few times. I only hope that God will use me for the good of his kingdom. This has been on my heart to post for a while. I wanted to spread the news of God's love by using a bit of my story. And the best part is that its not over yet. (: I still have many more years to come. So, I just want everyone to remember that GOD LOVES YOU NO MATTER WHAT!!!! He will never leave you or forsake you.

THIS WEEKS CHALLENGE: Photograph your favorite place in the world. It could be any where ex... Your room, the woods, the beach, or even a country. (Mine is at the top.)
Send it in to; Chaotickirstie@live.com

Thank you so much.

GOD LOVES YOU,
Kirstie.